What Pets Actually Want: Science-Backed Secrets to Keeping Your Pets Truly Happy
The Huberman Lab with Dr. Karolina Westlund | November 5, 2025
Most pet owners adore their furry companions and want nothing more than to keep them healthy and happy. But have you ever asked yourself — what does my pet actually want?
It turns out that what makes animals truly content isn’t always what we assume. According to neurobiologist Dr. Andrew Huberman and animal ethologist Dr. Carolina Westlund, our pets’ happiness depends not on luxury or comfort, but on how well we meet their natural, evolutionary needs.
In their powerful discussion on the Huberman Lab Podcast, Dr. Westlund explains that understanding the biology and psychology of pets is the real secret to fulfilling relationships.
This post unpacks their conversation into science-based insights and actionable tips to help you see the world through your pet’s eyes — and become the kind of guardian they truly need.
The Science of Ethology: Seeing the World Through Your Pet’s Eyes
The foundation of Dr. Westlund’s approach is ethology, the study of animal behavior in natural environments. Rather than asking how to make pets obey, ethologists ask a deeper question:
What would this animal be doing if it weren’t living with humans?
That question reveals an uncomfortable truth — most pets live in environments that satisfy human preferences, not their biological instincts. Dogs bred to hunt rarely get to chase. Cats born to stalk spend their days in still apartments. The result? Unmet emotional drives disguised as “bad behavior.”
Why This Perspective Matters
Ethology helps us design environments that nurture an animal’s mental and emotional health. When we align their world with their instincts — allowing them to sniff, chase, scratch, or hide — their stress levels drop, their relationships improve, and their behavior stabilizes.
Key Takeaway: Every action your pet takes — from barking to scratching — is communication. Understanding that “language” turns frustration into empathy.
Dogs: The Emotional Scientists of the Animal World
Dogs are deeply emotional, sensory-driven creatures with brains wired for connection, curiosity, and purpose. They see the world primarily through their noses, gathering complex emotional information from scents.
Dr. Westlund emphasizes that every dog carries an “evolutionary job description.” Knowing that job is the key to a fulfilled life.
What Your Dog’s Breed Was Born to Do
During domestication, humans selected dogs for specific steps in the wolf predatory sequence — the series of actions wolves use when hunting. Each modern breed expresses different parts of that sequence, which explains why their behaviors vary so dramatically.
| Predatory Stage | Modern Behavior | Example Breeds |
|---|---|---|
| Sniff + Orient | Detecting scents and tracking | Beagle, Bloodhound |
| Stalk + Point | Freezing in focus, signaling prey | Pointer, Setter |
| Chase | Sprinting after moving objects | Greyhound, Whippet |
| Grab + Bite | Tugging, shaking toys | Terrier, Bulldog |
| Carry | Retrieving items gently | Golden Retriever, Labrador |
| Consume | Guarding or chewing objects | Mastiff, Rottweiler |
Understanding your dog’s position in this sequence helps you design play, training, and environments that feel meaningful to them.
Practical Tip:
- For scent hounds, create treasure hunts or nose work games.
- For retrievers, play structured fetch or water retrieves.
- For herders, try agility, obedience, or puzzle toys that require focus.
The Emotional Blueprint: Safety, Calm, and Connection
Dogs live emotionally rich lives, shaped by their interactions with humans. To understand their inner world, Dr. Westlund uses a model from neuroscience called the Core Affect Space — a map of emotions based on two axes:
- Valence (pleasant ↔ unpleasant)
- Arousal (high ↔ low)
The Emotional Life of Pets
Visualize your dog’s emotional state within four quadrants:
| Arousal / Emotion | Pleasant (Positive Emotion) | Unpleasant (Negative Emotion) |
|---|---|---|
| High Arousal (Active / Alert) | Energetic & Joyful – Playful excitement – Curiosity and exploration – Healthy social engagement – Motivated learning | Anxious or Reactive – Fear or frustration – Aggression or barking – Overstimulation – Restlessness |
| Low Arousal (Calm / Resting) | Content & Secure – Relaxation and trust – Safety and satisfaction – Cuddling or resting near humans – Balanced nervous system | Withdrawn or Depressed – Boredom or apathy – Loneliness or disinterest – Avoidance behavior – Low engagement |
Your goal is to help your dog spend more time in Quadrants 1 and 2 — engaged and happy, or calm and secure.
That’s achieved through safety, predictability, and meaningful stimulation.
Building Emotional Safety Through Touch and Trust
One of the most common mistakes owners make is assuming all dogs like to be petted the same way. Dr. Westlund recommends offering consent-based touch:
- Offer your hand and scratch lightly.
- Stop and watch the reaction.
- If the dog leans in, continue. If it moves away, respect that signal.
Fast pats on the head often mimic restraint, which dogs can interpret as threatening. Instead, use slow, steady strokes along the side or chest to trigger oxytocin release — the same hormone that strengthens social bonds in both dogs and humans.
Key Takeaway: Dogs don’t just read your tone — they read your nervous system.
Calm yourself first; your dog will follow your emotional lead.
Debunking the “Dominance” Myth
Dog training culture has long been influenced by the outdated idea of dominance — the notion that humans must assert control to be “alpha.”
Dr. Westlund dismantles this misconception:
“In ethology, dominance simply means priority of access to resources — not power, aggression, or leadership.”
Dogs know humans aren’t part of their pack hierarchy. They don’t need dominance; they need clarity and safety. When we use force or intimidation, dogs may obey, but they do so from fear, not trust.
Replace Dominance With Leadership
- Lead calmly and consistently.
- Use positive reinforcement, not punishment.
- Reward focus and calmness rather than suppressing excitement.
- Establish predictable routines that reduce anxiety.
Key Takeaway: Real leadership doesn’t demand submission—it inspires confidence.
Reading the Language of Dogs: Beyond the Wagging Tail
Dogs are masters of non-verbal communication. They constantly signal how they feel through posture, movement, and subtle cues.
Common Dog Signals (and What They Mean)
| Behavior | Interpretation |
|---|---|
| Tail wagging mostly to the right | Relaxed, positive emotion |
| Tail wagging mostly to the left | Caution or stress |
| Soft eyes, slow blinks | Trust and relaxation |
| Tense body, raised tail | Alert or anxious |
| Play bow | Invitation to play |
| Lip-licking or yawning | Attempting to self-soothe |
Reading these signs helps prevent miscommunication and deepens connection.
Pro Tip: Use the MARS rule to tell play from aggression:
- Meta signals (like play bows)
- Activity shifts (switching games)
- Role reversals (taking turns winning)
- Self-handicapping (big dog goes easy on small dog)
These are the hallmarks of healthy, joyful play.
Cats: The Mysterious Minds of the Pet World
Cats often appear aloof, but ethology reveals that their behavior is rooted in solitary hunting instincts, not indifference. Their communication is subtle, precise, and sensory-based.
Understanding Cat Behavior
- Head Bumping: Scent marking — a way of blending your scent with theirs.
- Bringing “Gifts”: Returning prey to a safe space, not offering presents.
- Tail Movements: Slow waves = confidence; fast flicks = agitation.
- Purring: Usually comfort, but can also mean self-soothing during stress.
Key Takeaway: Cats don’t misbehave—they communicate boundaries and trust through body language.
The Power of Early Handling
Kittens that experience gentle human contact between 2–8 weeks old for at least one hour daily grow into more affectionate adults. Early exposure teaches them that human touch is safe, reducing fear and anxiety later in life.
Tip: When adopting, ask how your kitten was raised. Early socialization predicts emotional resilience.
Designing a Cat-First Home
To make your home cat-friendly:
- Separate feeding and litter areas: Cats instinctively avoid eliminating near food.
- Provide vertical territory: Shelves and cat trees satisfy their need for security and observation.
- Encourage foraging: Use puzzle feeders or hide kibble to mimic hunting.
- Offer choice: Let cats decide when and how to interact.
Key Takeaway: Respect independence. Giving your cat control over its environment builds trust and happiness.
The Emotional Intelligence of Animals: Empathy, Fairness, and Connection
Scientific research confirms what pet owners have long intuited: animals experience empathy and fairness.
In one famous experiment by primatologist Frans de Waal, two capuchin monkeys performed the same task. When one received a cucumber and the other got a grape, the short-changed monkey hurled the cucumber back in protest.
This isn’t just funny — it’s evidence of moral awareness in animals. Dogs also react to unequal treatment and appear distressed when companions receive better rewards.
Insight: Social species evolved empathy because cooperation increases survival.
The calmer and more emotionally intelligent the group, the better everyone thrives.
So when your dog comforts you during sadness or your cat curls up beside you when you’re sick, it’s not coincidence — it’s empathy in action.
Key Takeaway: The bond between humans and pets is ancient, emotional, and reciprocal.
The Two Pillars of Animal Happiness: Safety and Stimulation
Across all species, emotional balance depends on two universal needs:
- Safety — the absence of threat.
- Stimulation — meaningful engagement with the world.
A dog that doesn’t feel safe can’t play. A cat that feels bored can’t thrive. The healthiest pets experience predictable security and regular mental challenges.
How to Provide Both
- Predictability: Establish consistent feeding, walking, and rest routines.
- Variety: Rotate toys, explore new walking routes, introduce new scents or textures.
- Choice: Let pets choose when to rest, play, or approach.
- Purpose: Give dogs jobs aligned with their instincts—tracking, retrieving, herding games.
- Connection: Stay emotionally present; your calm energy shapes theirs.
Key Takeaway: Mental enrichment isn’t a luxury—it’s a form of love.
Becoming a Better Guardian: Compassion Meets Science
At its core, Dr. Westlund’s message is simple but profound: the best pet care begins with empathy and understanding.
Happiness for pets doesn’t come from control or indulgence—it comes from meeting their emotional and biological needs.
🐾 Final Lessons from “What Pets Actually Want”
- Respect instincts: Sniffing, hunting, climbing—they’re not quirks; they’re needs.
- Forget dominance: Build trust, not fear.
- Read their language: Watch the body, not the myth.
- Promote calm: Your peace becomes their peace.
- Provide stimulation: Fulfill their evolutionary purpose daily.
- Empower through choice: Respect autonomy and emotion equally.
Ultimate Takeaway: The happiest pets aren’t the most pampered—they’re the most understood.
Ready to Put This Into Practice?
Understanding your pet’s emotions is powerful—but consistency turns knowledge into transformation. To help you apply these insights every day, we’ve created a free, printable Daily & Weekly Pet Care Checklist based on Dr. Carolina Westlund’s science-backed principles. It’s an easy-to-follow guide that helps you build safety, trust, and enrichment into your pet’s routine.
Download the checklist below and start giving your pet the balanced, fulfilling life they truly deserve.
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